Home of the Cuttlefish Fan Club

PZ's regular readers may be acquainted with the poetry of commenter "Cuttlefish, OM", whose own blog is chock full of his witty, satirical rhymes. As prose, and not poetry, is my own literary background, I can't tell you why I love his stuff in a way that will earn me an A+ and a smileyface sticker from my Analyzing Poetry professor. I'll just say, the man has flow. Here's his latest masterpiece, about a certain ex-Nixon-speechwriter turned conspiracy theorist.

I am the very model of a devious creationist
I've made a film that's best described as stolen-animationist
I know the use of rhetoric when facts are unavailable
To render the impossible into the unassailable

I'm very well acquainted, too, with data manufacturing
I'll claim I stand on solid granite even as it's fracturing
I document complexity, like when it's irreducible...
And think my movie's in the league of Arthur Miller's Crucible

And think my movie's in the league of Arthur Miller's Crucible
And think my movie's in the league of Arthur Miller's Crucible
And think my movie's in the league of Arthur Miller's Crucible

I'm very good at lying, both the verbal and statistical—
Like Darwin in his later years, I'm openly theistical
In short, you might describe me as a mental masturbationist
I am the very model of a devious creationist

I believe we need to assign Cuttlefish his very own heroic theme song. Possibly that old R.E.M. tune. "Iamb, iamb, iamb Superman..." (Of course, unlike the Expelled producers, we better make sure we secure the proper music rights first.)

(Okay, start the flames over my lousy pun in the comments whenever you're ready...)